With apologies to Mike Klis, nobody cares about the return of Shanny

The NFL's 2013 schedule, which was announced last night, will provide fodder for months' worth of inane columns.

Yahoo's Jason Cole got the ball rolling last night by suggesting that the Broncos/Ravens season opener would be overhyped, and thus one of the year's ten worst matchups.

Today, we have Mike Klis claiming that the Broncos' biggest matchup, as far as Broncos Land is concerned, is the return of Mike Shanahan in Week 8.

With that in mind, we thought we'd be a little inane ourselves.  Here are our top ten reasons why the return of Shanny isn't the Broncos' biggest storyline for 2013 (we'll spare you the Bleacher Report-like slideshow, since we're too poor to afford the license agreement):

  1. Shanny's been gone for five years. That's 35 in dog years.
  2. The luster is gone off Shanny's mastermind crown, replaced by a deeper base tan.
  3. He's in the NFC East now, so he's less important than Dan Snyder and Jerry Jones.
  4. There's just no rivalry between the two franchises, SB 22 notwithstanding.
  5. Storylines never grow bigger than Peyton Manning's return to Indy.
  6. Peyton/Eli requires no explanation.
  7. Peyton vs. Brady 14 is the best matchup there is, and cannot be overhyped.
  8. We have PMFM.
  9. We have PMFM.
  10. Ditto.

We love Shanny, and will be eternally grateful for his role in bringing consecutive SB titles to Denver. It's great to see that he's turning things around in Washington, and we continue to wish him well.

But his return to SAF@MH just isn't that big of a deal.

Doug is IAOFM’s resident newsman and spelling czar. Follow him on Twitter @IAOFM