After receiving dozens of requests from readers to bring limericks back to football, I've finally decided to do it.
What brought me back from the depths of bawdy and crude artistic expression?
The Denver Broncos' quarterback debate--that, and a whole hell of a lot of time to kill during a lockout.
Orton versus Tebow?
Tebow and Orton versus Quinn?
Woody Paige versus the world?
All of it pales in comparision to whether I can work in a reference to Rick Mirer, The Bible, and Jockey underwear on a Sunday afternoon.
Enjoy. If you dare.
There once was a guy named Orton;
A neckbeard he was a sportin’.
“I’m the starter,” he said.
“Woody Paige can drop dead
and suck down my big harpoon gun.”
He’ll always work harder than you,
and sing bible verses on queue.
The lockout? A blessing.
More squats? Just guessing.
Jockey’s profits are sure to ensue.
Did you sleep on the mighty Quinn?
He’s not simply Rick Mirer’s twin.
If Matt Cassel can play,
then no doubt he can stay
until Hillis is not a sin.