The Daily Lard 8-13-11

Good Morning, Broncos fans! The details of Matt Prater's DUI arrest are pretty embarrassing*, laughable within the context that nobody got hurt and it all occurred within the confines of a parking lot. Sounds like our idiot kicker picked up a waitress/bartender/stripper at Shotgun Willie's, backed his Blazer into a parked car, and then tried to get a room in the hotel of said parking lot after being yelled at by a bunch of witnesses. When that didn't work out, he ditched the young lady and headed over to a nearby La Quinta where the police found him.

Prater then proceeded to fail his sobriety test and took a breathalyzer test at the police station, telling the cops along the way, "I really messed up. I'm going to lose my job. I deserve this." Meanwhile, the Broncos released the following statement:

Our organization is disappointed with the poor judgment shown by Matt Prater on Aug. 2. This matter, which was addressed with the team last week, continues to be thoroughly reviewed internally.

Drinking and driving is without doubt a serious matter, as comedic as this tale appears to be. But let's just be glad no one was injured, and hope that Prater and his teammates learn a good lesson from his shenanigans.

* Speaking of embarrassing, I'm reminded that I forgot to mention that it's Doc's birthday today! Please join all of us in wishing Doc a happy one, with many healthy ones to come!

Broncos


In analyzing Broncos/Cowboys, PFF's Sam Monson thinks Tebow's nullified INT would actually have been a completion for a first down to David Anderson. He also liked Tebow's nullified TD run, but calls him "very much a work in progress."

In evaluating the preseason debuts of several young QBs, Doug Farrar was pleasantly surprised by the progress of Tebow and his footwork, although he still thinks a team will have to tailor its offense to fit Tebow's skills. Meanwhile, Bucky Brooks thinks Tebow showed that he at least deserves a shot at the Broncos' starting gig.

Klis profiles Willis McGahee and reminds us that the Fiesta Bowl in which the RB blew out his knee also happened to be Mo Clarett's shining national moment.

Legwold's notes on the Broncos' too-many-men penalty and Kyle McCarthy's first sack since high school, plus Kenny Legan's post-game notes for the official site.

Mike Freeman just doesn't see Tebow as an NFL QB, and he thinks Tim's decision to play for Urban Meyer in college is the biggest reason.

Gregg Doyel got some interesting emails in response to his blunt Tebow column from the other day.

If any of you recall the days when TJ Simers covered the Broncos for the Rocky, here's a reminder of why you probably don't miss him.

Trimmings


The NFL will be adding an eighth official deep in the defensive secondary for 12 preseason games as a test to see if it's worth doing so full time in a year or two. Why wouldn't it be?

The Ravens acquired WR Lee Evans from the Bills for a 2012 fourth-rounder. Chase Stuart thinks Evans has been hampered by playing with craptastic QBs.

LB Stephen Cooper has re-signed with the Chargers.

CB Ike Taylor broke his thumb last night in the Steelers' loss to the Skins.

Tar Heels DE Michael McAdoo has been declared eligible for the supplemental draft.

Don Chandler, a punter and kicker who won two NFL titles and two Super Bowls with the Giants and Packers, passed away Thursday at age 76.

More impressions from PFF: Chargers/Seahawks, Raiders/Cards, Eagles/Ravens, Jags/Pats. Plus, camp reports: Pat Kirwan on the Titans, Jim Trotter on the Rams, and Nancy Gay on the Seahawks.

Matt Bowen on why we should watch Vince Young, Lee Evans to Baltimore, and the NFL-readiness of Terrell Owens.

Brian Burke says ESPN's new Total QBR is a vast improvement over the traditional QB Rating, but is far from perfect and limited in its usefulness. Meanwhile, Kevin Braig of CHFF thinks it's just a made-for-TV stat created for the intellectually lazy football fan.

As MJD points out, lots of touchbacks may mean less excitement for us, but if it also means fewer serious injuries then it's well worthwhile.

Bears fan Barack Obama wasn't too thrilled to be hosting the Packers at the White House, although he hilariously suggested they trade Aaron Rodgers to Chicago - guess he's not much the Jay Cutler fan? Plus, LB Desmond Bishop forgot his ID and couldn't get in for the ceremony.

Scrapple


More epic mailbag from Bill Simmons.

Florio is getting a TV show on Versus.

The best of the week in quotes from FO.

Pete Thamel is also skeptical about the NCAA's claims they plan to reform. Plus, notes on college ball from Chris Brown.

Doug is IAOFM’s resident newsman and spelling czar. Follow him on Twitter @IAOFM

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