The Daily Lard 5-26-11

Good Morning, Broncos fans! Jason La Canfora writes that the Broncos don't necessarily intend to trade Kyle Orton at this point, and that some within the organization expect Orton to be the starting QB this season. As the NFLN reporter puts it, Orton can be had for a "high second-round pick" that could turn into a first-rounder based upon production. It's sort of a strange thing to say, as who can ever really predict which teams will be picking higher than others? Then again, how many QB-needy teams are expected to be any good? Frankly, the whole column is a bit puzzling and meandering, but I suppose the gist is that Denver is continuing to put word out that Orton's price is a second-rounder. Conditional first-rounder? Good luck with that...

Broncos


More reaction from Rod Smith on the Joplin disaster via NFLN. Plus, Doug Farrar on the same.

As the front office heads out for a two-week vacation, Brian Xanders again says they're prepared for rookie and veteran free agency. Klis' thoughts on the same.

The ever-passionate Legwold says the Broncos don't plan to tank it for Andrew Luck. First of all, nobody tanks it in the NFL, and even if the Broncos wanted to they obviously wouldn't be telling Captain Obvious about it. But I'd bet that given the choice between being 6-10 and 3-13, Elway & Co. would take the worse record if it means a chance at Luck...

Anyone ever get tired of reading about Marty, The Drive and The Fumble? Yeah, me neither. Poor guy.

Another clip on David Bruton's substitute teaching, this one via Vic Lombardi.

Tim Tebow will be the keynote speaker at a banquet in Naples, FL tonight.

CBA


Albert Breer on the brief NFL coaches filed in support of the players in the labor dispute.

Judy Battista writes that the league may expand rosters this year if the preseason gets cut short.

Jack Bechta offers the agent's view on the lockout and writes that DeMaurice Smith doesn't want to set the precedent of giving back previously-won gains to management without proof of hardship.

Trimmings


Longtime Ravens and Browns kicker Matt Stover is retiring.

Meanwhile, Torry Holt isn't quite ready to call it quits.

Clinton Portis is basically interested in going to any of the top teams to play. Matt Bowen thinks he could fit as a situational back with the Pats.

Chad Johnson's next stunt? Snake wrangling, an idea unintentionally provided by Bengals owner Mike Brown.

Colts coach Tom Moore has supposedly retired again. Who does he think he is? Brett Favre?

Teicher on the Chiefs' tornado relief efforts.

Notes from McDonald on the Raiders' second day of player workouts.

Matt Barrows of the SacBee lists all of the player-led workouts so far.

Alex Marvez on the new player safety rules and how they relate to the Steelers. Shockingly, James Harrison isn't pleased.

John Clayton makes one of his typically ridiculous arguments as to why the Cards should trade for Kevin Kolb. What do the examples of Matt Schaub and Matt Cassel have to do with how Kolb might fare in Arizona? I suppose this is what people do when they neither watch film nor understand stats...

PFW's post-draft look at the Dolphins.

PFF's Nathan Jahnke evaluates Packers guard Josh Sitton.

Wes Bunting checks in on Auburn's best pro prospects.

Andy Barrall digs up memories of the Scott Norwood SB.

Scrapple


Exemplary, classy move by Barry Bonds - he's paying for the college educations of Brian Stow's children. (via SOB)

And as With Leather astutely points out, the act would be getting a whole heck of a lot more attention if it were Tim Tebow.

Mike Freeman thinks black athletes are being hypocrites and displaying a remarkable lack of awareness when they use gay slurs.

Much, much less classy: Tiki Barber likens himself to Anne Frank. (via SOB)

Gus Johnson + the Boom Goes the Dynamite guy + Tosh.0 = Hilarity

Weed Against Speed examines Rick Reilly's latest disaster of a column.

The Rays value their fans so much that they kicked a holder of seven season tickets out of the Trop for wearing a "Yankees Suck" T-shirt. That's ridiculous, and yes the Yankees do indeed suck.

Doug is IAOFM’s resident newsman and spelling czar. Follow him on Twitter @IAOFM

The Lard

2014 Offseason

All Offseason Coverage