The Daily Lard 4-5-12

Good Morning, Broncos fans! The Chargers continue to collect diminutive receivers/returners (pissants) ala Mouse Davis and Tiger Ellison's run-and-shoot offense of the 1960s.

Having already signed our old friend Eddie Royal, who measures 5-10, San Diego on Tuesday added Roscoe Parrish, who is listed as being an inch shorter than Eddie. Yesterday, the team signed 5-11 wideout/returner Michael Spurlock, formerly of the Bucs. Incumbent returner Richard Goodman, who is also a wide receiver, towers over the rest at 6-0.

Early in free agency, the team replaced the 6-5 Vincent Jackson with the 6-2 Robert Meachem, and while that's a downgrade in height, there aren't that many receivers out there with VJ's stature. The team also let the 6-0 WR Bryan Walters move on to San Diego.

Of course, Davis made mighty-mite wideouts the focus of his offense because he couldn't procure bigger/better talent while coaching high school football in Oregon. So what's San Diego's excuse?

Broncos

Jim Plunkett dropped two bombs on Dave Krieger by saying the keys to Denver's season are the health of Peyton Manning, and surrounding him with the proper talent. You don't say...

Jeff Legwold says that of course, the Broncos offense will look a lot like that of the Colts', and he thinks Denver should look at PSU DT Devon Still.

Mike Klis on Denver's preseason Peyton Manning rejection tour.

Trimmings

According to Mike Silver, it's been documented on film that Gregg Williams offered his players money to injure Alex Smith before the Saints' playoff loss to the Niners in January. Plus, add Carlos Rogers to the list of players who say Williams offered bounties while coaching in Washington.

San Diego also re-signed DE Luis Castillo and is in talks with Raiders T Mario Henderson; KC re-signed CB Travis Daniels.

Bill Parcells is denying reports he's talking to Zygi Wilf, who is apparently desperate to have the Tuna take over the Vikings.

Philly agreed to a five-year deal with former Bills OT Demetress Bell, whose name had apparently been misspelled as Demetrius until now.

Arizona added S James Sanders and re-upped P Dave Zastudil; Minnesota agreed with CB Chris Carr; Carolina signed S Reggie Smith.

In response to the news that Morris Claiborne scored a four on his Wonderlic but reportedly has a learning disability, Mike Florio learned that there are accommodations made in such cases, but it appears our favorite agent Bus Cook screwed up big time by not getting help for his client. Meanwhile, Ronde Barber says Wonderlic scores aren't a big deal.

Torry Holt officially retired yesterday as a St. Louis Ram after signing a one-day contract with them.

Along with those of the Raiders, Nike did not alter the jerseys of the Packers, Panthers, Falcons, and Eagles. The unveiling of alternate jerseys is apparently up to each team's discretion (how about going back to the pre-1997 orange jerseys?!). Meanwhile, a judge affirmed the ruling which halted Reebok's last-minute money grab on Peyton Manning and Tim Tebow apparel, and the Panthers' new jersey feature a message from the late Sam Mills sewn inside the neckline.

Roger Goodell makes a lot of money, but the head of NFLN actually makes a bit more.

Steelers RB coach Kirby Wilson, who is recovering from his burns, visited the team's practice facility yesterday.

Ryan Leaf is being held in Montana until that state and Texas figure out what to do with the troubled ex-QB.

Scrapple

Jack Bechta thinks college players are not getting anywhere near the medical care they should be getting, and are arriving in the NFL as damaged goods.

Tom Gowers revisits the 2006 Draft which landed Denver Jay Cutler, Brandon Marshall, and Elvis Dumervil. Then there's Greg Jennings, whom they were going to pick before the Packers called and offered Javon Walker for the draft choice. Oops.

Bucky Brooks lists his top 50 draft prospects, in order.

Mike Tanier ponders the advanced age (relative to other prospects) of Oklahoma State QB Brandon Weeden; Doug Farrar and Greg Cosell talk RB/WR prospects on their latest podcast.

Doug Farrar evaluates Nebraska DE/DT Jared Crick; Jonathan Bales scouts Oklahoma State FS Markelle Martin; Matt Bowen examines ND WR Michael Floyd and explains the responsibilities of Cover-2 safeties.

Khaled Elsayed turns his attention to the 2008-10 drafts of the Browns and Vikings.

Doug is IAOFM’s resident newsman and spelling czar. Follow him on Twitter @IAOFM

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