Brian Xanders doesn't exactly fit the mold of what we expect from a general manager: He's got a double chin. His clothes don't fit. He has a tendency to rush his sentences, omit words, state facts as if they were original thoughts, and mix verb tenses. Hell, the guy used to clean pools.
In short, he's everything Joe Ellis isn't. It's for this reason, and the way he handled the recent re-signing of Champ Bailey, that the X-Man is starting to grow on me.
So I went back and spent an exceedingly long time reading and listening to interviews Xanders has given since he was named General Manger of the Denver Broncos for real. At first, I mistook his responses for gobbledygook. My mind went numb; my senses failed. Soon, I was unable to determine the questions from the answers. I fell into a Xanders-induced stupor.
When I came to, however, I realized that inside all of this undeciphered madness, Xanders had a plan. After so many interviews, he's let a few things slip.
Later this week, I'll tell you what I think that plan is. Today, however, I wanted to have a little more fun at the expense of Xanders before I begin singing his praises.
So I gathered together a few dozen of the best quotes Xanders has given. I plugged them into a random quote generator. I think you'll enjoy....
The Brian Xanders Random Quote Generator
- Brian Xanders, General Manager, Denver Broncos
(NOTE: To generate another random quote from X-Man, click the magic button below!)