There are eight rules of Fight Club.
Roger Goodell and DeMaurice Smith have broken all of them, except one:
"Fights will go on as long as they have to."
Although all of us out here in fanville would prefer they simply followed rule one (don't talk about Fight Club!), it's been unavoidable. For every one of Smith's biting and over-the-top punches, Goodell (and his lap dog Jeff Pash) have countered with a calculated yet Chicken Little-ish jab.
I've seen girl fights more exciting than this. At least girls pull hair.
At this point in the process, what more is there to do than sit back, relax, sip some iced tea, wait for litigation, and try out our newest random quote generator?
Give it a whirl and see what happens when DeMaurice Smith and Roger Goodell say ridiculous things at the same time. I've included 30 quotes from each, so have as many spins as you'd like. Don't forget to laugh. Feel free to even declare a winner if you'd like in the comments below.
Let's Get Ready To Rumble!
--- DeMaurice Smith, Head of the National Football League Players Association
--- Roger Goodell (or his lap dog Jeff Pash), Commissioner, National Football League
(NOTE: To see more fightin' words, click the magic button below!)