I'm not offended by the Tebow-as-Jesus jersey; in fact, I find it liberating. If some cat wants to spend a few hundred dollars of their hard-earned money outside of a strip club, who am I to judge?
Escapism is the American way. Some folks get addicted to gambling. Some folks get addicted to drugs. Some folks buy another man's replica jersey. Raiders fans do all three.
The point is that dudes that played Dungeons and Dragons have to grow up someday. And when they grow up, they wear jerseys.
So I came up with a few jerseys of my own that all Broncos fans can get behind.
Even the nerds.
You knew this was coming, didn't you?
The Kyle Orton billboards have arrived. Orton never got any love in Denver.
Funny how a move to backup quarterback can suddenly increase a guy's popularity.
Enjoy, and please remember to take your blood-pressure medication if you don't have a funny bone, bleed orange and blue, or if you simply have high blood pressure.
If you didn't notice on Tuesday, my billboards changed the entire course of the Denver Broncos.
That's right, my billboards from last week were the primary reason John Fox made the change at quarterback.
What? You don't agree? Well, blame it on Kyle Orton's 21.0 quarterback rating if you want to, but I know I played my part.
I was just getting warmed up, too. Here's another round of Tebow billboards on the house.
Feel free to enter your own billboard slogan in the comments below, but be warned: you might put your eye out.
Or worse, you might pull a groin. Then were will you be?
You know it was only a matter of time before I got involved.
After our Gut Reaction to last week's game, I had several requests to create more Tebow billboards.
Since I never turn down readers' requests when they ask nicely--or correct typos--I thought I'd give the people what they want.
Are you not entertained?
Hit it after the jump and find out.
Oh, and since this billboard thing isn't going away anytime soon, I'll keep beating this dead bronco until it's really dead--you know, dead like Todd Haley's head-coaching prospects after the season.
The lockout has come to an end.
I find myself filled with terror--more terror than that time I woke up in downtown Oakland with an orange and blue butterfly tattoo and wearing only a Broncos thong.
Am I going to have Roger Goodell to pick on any more?
Probably. As long as Goodell makes a ridiculous $10 million for being Jerry Jones' lapdog and imposing inconsistent fines, he'll remain a comedic gold mine. If not, I thought I'd get my licks in one last time.
As I was navigating traffic between downtown Denver and the Tech Center the other day, I found myself with some time to kill.
That is to say I was stuck in traffic.
Rather than complain--or worse, tune in to 104.3 The Fan--I decided to do what any Broncos fan would do when faced with a similar crisis.
I started reading bumper stickers.
Here are five that I saw.
I'm quite sure I'll have more for you in the future.
It was great to see the NFL commissioner empathize with fans yesterday.
I was moved to tears.
Wait, that was just some lingering Denver Nuggets regret and the dry Colorado air.
Oh well, I thought I'd honor the commish--and his pay cut--Fat Man style.
An 18-game schedule may be off the table in the current battle between the owners and the players. Until we get the official word, however, I'll just assume that Roger Goodell is profoundly concerned with the safety of the players...
What happens when you mix Valentine's Day with the Denver Broncos' front office?
Joe Ellis covering Prince, that's what.
Welcome to yet another preposterous and fictional journey into the bending of time and space we like to call the Really, Really Blind Side. You will never be the same again...
Here's the latest installment of our ongoing FICTIONAL series, The Really, Really Blind Side.
Today, we're taking a look at how the Broncos really came to the decision to hire John Fox.
What's in a name? You'll see...