Perhaps many of you remember Mad Libs.
They were the creation of screenwriter Leonard Stern, who passed away earlier this week.
In honor of Stern, Mad Libs, and the ridiculousness that is the NFL lockout, we decided to give you our own fill-in-the-blank Mad Lib.
This one is a letter to Roger Goodell.
Just fill in each blank with whatever comes to your mind and click on the "create story" button once you are done. A small window will pop up with your own letter. You can copy your story from the window in the comments below if you'd like. I took the liberty of creating the first.
It should be ridiculous. But that's the point of Mad Libs.
Good Morning, Broncos fans! I'd love to wax unpoetic on something or the other, but frankly nothing jumps out. So let's just get straight to the links, and have a great Saturday everyone!
Gray Caldwell spoke with new offensive line coach Dave Magazu, who stressed that he wants his players to exhibit attitude and physicality.
St. Paul Fire & Insurance is suing the Broncos and several former players including Floyd Little, Randy Gradishar, Louis Wright and Barney Chavous over workers' comp claims.
The Broncos sent a care package to the family of a Broncos fan who perished while saving his family from the tornado in Joplin.
Golf Digest debunks USA Today's claim that Tim Tebow generates a ridiculous 141 mph clubhead speed. However, he still has a really fast swing.
Time to hit the tweets, with plenty of insight into our Broncos this week. As always, none of these tweets have been altered in any way, innocent misspellings inclusive. It's all meant in good fun, so hopefully you'll get a good laugh as we head into the weekend...
DJ Williams is not quite what we'd call a foodie, but he sure has specific tastes:
Anyone else get fries from Micky D's then drive to the nearest Wendys and get nuggets ?
Wanted: 5'5-5'11, 130-160lb depn ,long jet Blk hair, drk eyes, olive skin, nice smile, must have a pointy nose, sense of humor.. Hit me up!
Happy Friday, Broncos fans! During the most recent player/owner negotiations, Roger Goodell has been portrayed as quite a bit more than the ownership lapdog he was depicted as only weeks ago. Word is, the Commish has been key to the purported progress along with his recent dinner mate, NFLPA head De Smith. I wasn't sure if all this chatter was accurate or just a way to pump up Goodell's public image, not that it matters so much - after all, Goodell is just a representative of the owners, and the only impactful decisions he actually makes are suspensions (and hearing the appeals, but that's another debacle altogether).
Well, whatever positivity has been surrounding Goodell should be gone right about now, because he recently made it quite clear that he thinks we the fans are a bunch of morons. His schtick during recent season-ticket holder conference calls has featured iterations of the following:
We can't continue to shift the cost, whether it's the rising player cost or the rising cost of operating an NFL franchise, on to our fans. That's why we're trying to get a better economic model. And I think everyone understands that. You are not being left out of the equation. The fans are a big part of that equation and a big part of the success of NFL football.
So, your bosses locked out the players for our benefit? Gee, thanks Rog! Can't wait to see those cheaper ticket prices, and surely DirecTV's Sunday Ticket package will cost less once a new deal is reached, huh? Doug Farrar and Aaron Schatz offer their pointed reactions.
Von Miller has always been a prankster. They didn’t name his position at Texas A&M for his senior year Joker just for football reasons. His locker room antics and infectious grin are as much a part of him as his incredible ability to get low cutting around linemen. It’s just natural to him and who he is.
Miller recently put that sense of humor to work in getting a series of tattoos which included Pac-Man, a slice of watermelon, a dollar sign, a fried chicken drumstick and a Pac-Man ghost which he described as a ‘hater’. What I got from reading about it and listening to what he had to say was that Miller was making fun of those who pigeonhole others by race. He’s never minded getting a little attention for his antics - to him, this is no different.
Me? I’m a white guy, originally from Chicago, a city where one street is named ‘Division’ because for over a century and a half, blacks didn’t dare go above that street unless they were cleaning houses or clearing garbage. Race was a huge issue when I was younger. It went both ways, too - when I was at college, there was a dog visiting one of the dorms I lived it. I petted its head as I passed, and one of the group that was hanging out there yelled, “Bite that honky, dog!”. The rest of them laughed. They’d had worse aimed at them and probably just saw it as ‘giving some back’. Those kinds of incidents were common between whites and blacks, and neither was more to blame than the other.
Good Morning, Broncos fans! The lawyer-free negotiations continued yesterday, shifting from NYC to Long Island, and the word is that both sides realize that now is the time to get a deal done. Albert Breer writes that the owners want a deal that will hold up for a matter of decades, while the players want to make it clear they won't be pushed around by the league as in the past. Interestingly, Breer points out that the tenor of the labor dispute has not been nearly as contentious as it's been made out to be by the alarmist media.
Breer says the urgency of the negotiations is based upon the fact that the league would lose about a billion dollars if the preseason is canceled, and that would harm both sides. Apparently, a deal must be reached by around July 15 if there is to be a preseason in full. Plus, it seems the words of Judge Kermit Bye last week which suggested both sides would be harmed by whatever decision the Eighth Circuit comes down with has leveled the field of play and motivated the two sides to get a move on. Let's hope this momentum carries through...
Happy Wednesday, friends. It’s another nice day in Cleveland, and I hope that’s the case wherever you live too. I have to quickly address something, dating back to my last piece, and some of the nonsense that ensued in the comments section. I’ve said now for years that I’m in the saying what I think business, and not the arguing business. I let myself get dragged into some silly arguing on Monday, and I’ve reminded myself that that’s not what I want to be doing. There’s no value in it for me, or for anybody else. If you want to troll it up in my comments, you will not be engaged by me.
And now, back to regular football programming. It’s interesting to me how much Brandon Lloyd has been in the news lately, because I’ve been planning to write a piece about him for the better part of the week.
I don’t really get into the human side of players that much, as we have the outstanding Doc Bear keeping that covered as well as anybody on the internet, but with Lloyd, you almost have to consider his personality to get at how his career has gone, and why.
As mentioned in today's Lard, the NFL's owners and players reconvened for more labor negotiations yesterday, this time at a hotel in NYC. The talks are said to be continuing into today, and according to Jason La Canfora, are expected to again stretch for "several days" and featuring the same cast of characters as last week's negotiations (ie. no lawyers save for De Smith).
Meanwhile, Mike Freeman of CBS wrote this morning that the two sides "continue to close the gap on significant issues and there remains a slim chance a deal is reached before the 8th circuit rules in July." Freeman also writes that he believes the 2011 NFL season "is no longer in jeopardy."
Good Morning, Broncos fans! Remember the negotiations that led to Champ Bailey's latest contract with Denver? You know, when Champ announced he was putting his Littleton house on the market and a few people called the esteemed vet a selfish prima donna? Well, even if Champ later admitted it was nothing more than a negotiating tactic once he was signed and delivered, it turns out he wasn't totally bluffing. That very same house of Bailey's just went into contract on Monday for what's reported as a $1.39 million sale. Just another reminder of why it's okay if Champ loses a step or two over the next few years - his wisdom and ability to disguise what he's up to is good enough to fool us, and that's not even on the field. BTW, anyone else feel like this all happened about six years ago? That's the effect of the lockout for us...
Will John Fox be a good coach? Will he be a great coach? Will he be fired after two seasons?
Rather than offer up a Kool-Aid-based opinion, in which I defend Fox as a turnaround artist and the victim of bad ownership in Carolina, I thought I'd let sheer randomness take a crack at the question.
So let's start our own NFL. You've always wanted to do that, haven't you? Now, instead of being born an heir to the Johnson & Johnson fortune, you can just have a team. Yeah, I'm that nice a guy. Savor it.
The ground rules of our league are quite simple. We don't even need to pay Roger Goodell his meager $1 salary. The rules are as follows:
Why four seasons? Well, that happens to be a common contract length for a new coach. But who's counting, eh?